George Ezra, Hanky Panky & The Weak Bladdered Taxi Driver

Day 3:

The title pretty much sums my day up.

12 hours spent out on the road, travelling in taxi’s, buses, trains and on foot. One of those days where a fly on the wall would’ve pissed themselves. Speaking of which, I flagged a cab down this morning only for the driver to quickly get out as he, in his words, “need urination”. Whilst he was doing his urination, I swiftly flagged another cab down the road. Thankfully his bladder was made of sterner stuff.

Hours spent in cabs!

Hours spent in cabs!

Hanky Panky? That was a moment where I tried not to laugh in front of a customer. Classic example of something lost in translation. He was trying to say he likes people being clear, but instead came out saying “I don’t like hanky panky.” Somehow I held it together, maybe I was distracted by the caged bird in his office right next to me. Oh, did I not mention he had a caged bird in his office? Haven’t we all?


Quickly on to George Ezra. The only real “sometimes I love my job” moment I’ve had this week was when I was walking to one of my favourite joints. The sun was shining, Blame It On Me was blasting through my headphones, and I was looking straight at the city skyline, with the Burj Khalifa in the distance. One of the few things that went right for me today!

Burj Khalifa

Time to chat about food, and the other troubles I had today.

An early start and taxi to Dubai meant I hardly had time to finish breakfast.


After an hour in a cab and half an hour on the metro, arrival at my first meeting. A pretty incredible office. I ate a gingerbread snowman here…no way was I turning that down.


An hour and a half long meeting meant I was in a rush to get to my next meeting, which was out of the way. It was 12:30pm now and I was ravenous. Popped to the Dubai Mall, where I thought I’d be in heaven…


Which I would’ve been had I fancied McDonalds or Texas Fried Chicken. So I kind of got a bit like…


Thankfully I had my EMERGENCY QUEST BAR. Everyone should have one. It’s now 2pm, time for my meeting with a customer and his bird.

4pm rolls around, I’m well and truly hangry. Time to abandon this meeting and walk 30 minutes to The BookMunch Cafe. An awesome lemon iced tea, and this chicken and avocado salad.


6pm and it’s time to head back to base in Sharjah. First up was a journey on the metro that made the London Underground in rush hour seem like ultimate relaxation therapy. It’s not a place to be if you enjoy your personal space but is a haven if you love a bit of body contact with smelly strangers. Ordeal over, it was more taxi rides.

Over two hours later, I’m back.

It’s now 9pm: Dinner time. As ever, a random salad to start.


Then mains of some form of chicken, veggie curry and plenty of veg.


Dessert time! It had been a rough day, so decided I earned it, despite not hitting the gym. I’d been looking forward to this one all week. Oumali. A delicious traditional dessert, packed full of protein…


Yeah right! This was a bowl of warm, sugary, nutty, cinnamony and creamy heaven.

All in all, one of hell of a day. At least you can say it’s never dull.


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